Authenticity. What does it actually mean to be an authentic human? For me, it means coming back to wholeness. Living out loud, courageously, unapologetically. Living and speaking your truth, unafraid of what others will think or say, or whether they understand or “get” you. When you do this, you energetically vibrate on a level that naturally attracts to you what is good for you, what will help you continue your journey of growth and evolution. It doesn’t mean you won’t feel the duality of this world; pleasure/pain, health/sickness, loss/gain, etc. But it absolutely does mean that you will always deal with the world from a place of acceptance, joy or enthusiasm. You will always surrender to “what is”, without question, without resistance, without hesitation. You are still, you are aware, you are present, you are awakened, you are conscious. You are flowing with life.
Unfortunately, many of us walk through life feeling internally fractured, or “broken”. We feel empty, lack clarity, feel hopeless. Or simply, something just doesn’t feel right, something about the current course we’re on feels “off”. We lost touch with our intuition, our internal compass, somewhere along the journey and we’re not sure when or why or how. We harbor a deep pain energy within us, that often lays dormant, and sometimes emerges and overtakes us. It consumes our bodies, our minds, or both. We know there are parts of us that feel missing, or suppressed, but we aren’t sure how to heal or even why we should. I mean, after all, “its a dog eat dog world”, right? We need our ego armor to protect us, right?
What ultimately happens to many of us, is the emotional pain and the ego armor creates enough suffering that we say “enough is enough!” And we explore other ways of being, of living, of feeling like our lives matter. And this is where the deep healing begins. The coming back to wholeness. The return to our intuition, our connection to our higher selves, that “knows” there is more to this journey of life than what the “normal” collective consciousness has made us believe that it is. This is the emergence of our authentic selves. A return to wholeness.
My personal journey to authenticity has been an exploration of the parts of myself that I suppressed from childhood. The parts I kept hidden because I felt like I had to, in order to survive and be seen and heard, and loved, in the family I was born into. I was born with gifts. I’m an HSP (highly sensitive person), an empath and a visionary. I perceived the world in a very different way than everyone around me and anytime I spoke about it, I was met with stares of confusion, and then was either dismissed or, sadly, made fun of. And ask any HSP how they felt as a kid about being made fun of, and I guarantee you all of them will say it felt like death. So, as many children do, I learned how to perform roles to get my needs met, and to be acknowledged and validated by my parents, siblings and caretakers. This meant tucking away the parts that weren’t accepted, and only outwardly show what would garner attention and approval.
And as life goes on, we either we forget about these “parts” altogether, or we keep them very secret, emerging only in safest of times with the safest of people. As a result, we walk through life feeling like something is missing, something is broken, something just. isn’t. right. And as we carry on day after day, year after year, we energetically and unconsciously vibrate on a level that is inauthentic to us and in many ways, stunts our growth. We attract people and situations over and over again that do not serve our highest good. Many of us still find ways to enjoy life at times; we travel, we have careers, we engage in friendships and romantic relationships, we marry and have children. But we just never feel whole. We never feel like we’re where we are meant to be. Sadly, many people turn to destructive behaviors, including substance and behavior addictions, to satisfy that feeling of emptiness, but it is only ever temporary. True healing starts from within. True healing begins with an acknowledgment that we are not at all responsible for what happened to us as children, but we are 100% responsible for our own healing. Our parents did the best the could based on the level of consciousness they were on at the time. Forgiveness is one of the first steps to moving beyond the limitations imposed upon us as children, and the fractures and suppression of the parts of ourselves that weren’t accepted or loved.
Being “different” as a child, I saw things that were happening around me (and to me) and I felt a deep compulsion to help, to heal, to change it for the better. But I was a child and was impotent to doing what inherent in me, what I knew I came here to do. Fortunately, I never lost touch with my gifts. I always knew they were there, but I kept them well hidden. And all the while, continued to perform roles that my family, husband and society expected of me. These patterns of playing roles in order to be seen, heard and loved, lasted well into adulthood, as they do for many. But as my motherhood journey unfolded, and the calling to serve and empower women grew louder, I began to connect more deeply to who I truly was, and I was finally living my truth; and what was once “broken” began to heal.
Healing and living authentically for me means following the path of truth, and using my gifts of being a visionary, empath and intuitive to serve and restore harmony, balance and healing to humanity and the Earth. I have always knowns I hold the gift of energy healing and of expanding the minds of others, of expanding consciousness. These are the gifts of the Medicine Women of the past. The Modern Day Medicine Woman holds these and many more, and she is what I lovingly call The Conscious Feminist.
What does living authentically mean to you? What gifts have you forgotten about or are holding back that you’d like to manifest into the world? Respond below or message me. I’d love to hear from you and chat.